Today is another one of those “Oh yikes—what have I done to myself?” days.
This newly hatched scheme to write and publish a daily blog tests my mettle on more levels that I can even begin to imagine. Quite frankly, it scares the breath right out of me and yet somewhere along the line, I have a sense that I made an agreement long ago that this is something that I must do.
And do it I will. Long ago I learned that forever is a very long time, and that by the yard it’s hard, but by the inch it’s a cinch. I’m going to just skip the forever-is-hard part because it’s scary and instead, I’ll stick with the one-day-at-a-time inch by inch plan. Though I creep along at turtle speed, each step moves me one inch closer to the goal. Patience is golden.
Why? Why do I do these things to myself? I guess I must think that I have something left to learn, or that I need to give myself an upgraded opportunity to move off the dime and trend upward on the spiral of personal evolution.
Whatever the reason, I vacillate between love and fear—I love the excitement, the exhilaration of stretching myself and striving to live up to my own expectations, and yet simultaneously scare myself to pieces at the thought of failure and letting myself down again. Is this a test? I’ve heard it said that it’s always easier if you know in advance that it’s a test.
The truth is, I’m never happier than when I am writing. A commitment to a daily writing routine, though a stretch, bolsters my sense of connection with my spiritual Self, primes the pump of creativity to allow for a continuous flow of content, strengthens my will and self-discipline, builds self-confidence, and I can’t wait to find out whatever other gifts lie in store as I dig deeper. As for motive, another story for another day. So many more days.
It’s a journey and an adventure. I never know what’s coming. Sometimes it can be a little nerve wracking. But it helps me to remember a quote from The Voice in A Night Without TV: “Write your own story. Tell your own truth. Say it like it is in your world and do not concern yourself with how it is perceived. Judgment is not your job. Your job is simply to write.
Have faith and trust the wisdom of your heart for it will never let you down. Though it may not always be clear in the moment, in time you will know. Have patience. Be still and know.
Note: The beautiful image and meme above is courtesy of New Waves of Light (nwol.us).