Life in the Lazygirl

You know how much I love hanging out in my Lazygirl, right? Well, lucky me—I have been sentenced to The Chair for the next couple of months, courtesy of a klutzy move and a shattered right kneecap. If Covid wasn’t enough to do the trick, I have been given my very own personal timeout to reevaluate and reassess my life.

I trip over my own feet, break a bone, and marvel at the creative antics of a clever Universe that provides me with an opportunity to sit still long enough to pay attention. Sit. Stay! But will I listen? Visions of the Roadrunner with his legs spinning a mile a minute zoomed through my head, as I careened from one room into the next, desperately trying to keep up with a body that was charging at light speed ahead of my feet. It gives new meaning to hit the floor running.

So I’m sentenced to The Chair. Talk about a choice moment to decide if I’ll revert to my slothful old ways so sorely in need of repair, or if I’ll rise to the occasion and use the opportunity to forge ahead and recommit to my spiritual path and purpose. Or maybe check all of the above? Is this another test? If so, I seem to be flunking—at least for now—but there’s still time to make the necessary in-flight corrections before I Roadrunner myself straight into the afterlife.

So far, I’ve been stuck in the needs-repair place. It’s a lovely spot to visit for a while, but as a permanent parking place, it leaves a lot to be desired. If nothing else, it is a splendid opportunity to practice what I preach. Again? Do I have to? Up until now, the Lazygirl has been my all-time favorite parking spot. I wonder—will I still feel the same way once I’m sprung? Or will I flee like my pants will catch fire if I dare sit?

The needs-repair place includes heavy doses of procrastination. Where have I been since my last blog written nearly two months ago? What have I been doing? Why have I been gone for so long? Why am I dawdling? Aw geez. It’s always something. Always a choice about how I wish to live life in my lane. Or in my Lazygirl.

I have been captive for over two weeks already, and what have I learned so far? Well, I’ve not been doing the things that make me happy—not writing, not blogging, not doing much of anything that does much to increase my sense of self-worth. This current state of affairs is making me feel grumpy, useless, and downright disgusted with myself.

Those feelings are not helpful, uplifting, or good for the psyche. Is it okay to be nonproductive and still love me in spite of myself? I decide, right? Oh my—we’re looking at the tip of the iceberg here. There is so much to discover, unearth, and delve into. Do I want to see it? Or would I rather turn on Say Yes to the Dress and zone out watching brides make themselves happy by finding the perfect wedding dress? So far, I’ve said yes to the dress. What is it that I am trying to avoid? Whatever it is, I want to get over it, because it’s not good for my mental health.

It’s time to move on. I’m not quite sure where I’m moving on to at this point, but for now I’ll take one moment, one day at a time, and since that’s all I have, I’ll do my best to talk myself into making the best of it.

But here’s the thing—Just the act of writing this blog is enough to lift my spirits and give me hope. And it’s enough to make me realize and remember that I am the one who decides what I think and feel about myself, and about the world in which I live. I am the one who creates my beliefs and reality. Clearly, it’s better to shatter old useless, worn out thought forms instead of kneecaps, and allow the subtle realm of light to become known and seen.

Now that’s enough to put a smile on my face and dance a happy jig—well, just as soon as my knee is back in proper working order. Meanwhile, I’ll dance a jig in my heart and wait until the rest of me catches up.

PS: There really is a reasonable answer to where I’ve been and what I’ve been doing, but I’ll talk more about that in the next blog, so please stay tuned for an announcement about what will be coming soon! Oh, and by the way, if you click on my website, you won’t get very far because it is not fully up and running yet! Stay tuned . . . See you soon!

Note:  The photo above is courtesy of New Waves of Light, a website designed by anonymous individuals around the world who share the intention of bringing light and love to a world of darkness and chaos. (newwavesoflight.org or NWOL.us)

The Truth Will Set Your Free

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I had a little chat with my friend (the one who plans to buy a gun) and without going into great detail, it turns out that our differing interpretations of the meaning of yesterday’s blog (Faith Trumps Fear) was Venus and Mars.  I thought that such misperceptions only happened between men and women, but apparently, I was wrong.  That happens a lot.  That I’m wrong, I mean.

As the last child in my family, I often did not feel heard so I learned to stuff my words back down my throat to avoid choking on the disappointment of not having my needs met.  My inability to understand my feelings and express my thoughts became the undoing of my failed marriages, but thankfully, after decades of trial and error, I have learned a great deal.

Oh, there were lots of errors—sometimes comical, sometimes painful, and often they came wrapped up as a combination platter.  In one of my marriages, my husband and I developed what we called the two-week rule, a tool that we used in the midst of an argument, or anytime that we faced a weighty issue that affected both of us.  It gave us two weeks of radio silence to mull over options and consequences and seek answers from within.

At the end of one such period, my husband’s conclusion was that he was leaving.  “WHAT?  What do you MEAN that you’re leaving? That’s not what we were supposed to be thinking about,” I bellowed.  “That’s what we were thinking about and that’s my decision” he replied.  “Noooo—we were thinking about whether we would invite your son to come and stay with us for a while.”  Talk about the mother of all miscommunication!

So, he packed up and left.  But it didn’t last long.  He was back later that evening at which point I wanted to throw him out again.  We laughed about it later, but it wasn’t very funny at the time.

Hmmm. Why did I wander down this road, I wonder?  Is there a point?  Does it have to do with being wrong?  Or communication?  Or telling the truth?  Or check all of the above?   Or Maybe it’s just a way to crack open the door and take a peek to see if there is room for improvement to be made anywhere along the line.

There is truth and then there is Truth, and it takes conscious effort to decipher one from the other, to discern the difference between the voice of the self and the Voice of the Soul.  Communication on every level is a skill, a fine art.  To be successful it must be learned, studied, rehearsed, practiced.  But mostly it requires honesty with one’s self.  It’s a trial and error process.  Will there be mistakes?  Absolutely!  Will there be wrong turns?  Of course.  I’m an expert in both, but even in wrong turns, there is great value.  But like anything truly worth having, it is truly worth working for.

Oh—and as a side benefit, it may even eliminate a few trips to Venus or Mars and save a marriage or two.

Note:  The photo above is courtesy of New Waves of Light, a website designed by anonymous individuals around the world who share the intention of bringing light and love to a world of darkness and chaos. (newwavesoflight.org or NWOL.us).

Faith Trumps Fear

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I thought it would be easy.

It is easy.  You are the one who makes it hard by thinking that it is.

Oh, right.  I keep forgetting.  Thank You for reminding me.

Would you care to get on with it now?

Ok.

I have a friend who plans to get a gun as protection against what is for now, only an imaginary enemy.  That worries me because it says to me that fear is in play here, and fear is an enemy that cannot be annihilated with a gun.  Fear draws what is feared closer unto itself.

This morning when I read the news that two million chickens were killed because processing plants have stopped production due to the lack of employees, my heart skipped a beat as I thought about the poor chickens, and the utter waste of their lives.  Then came another headline about the possibility of food shortages.   Yep—I agree that such a possibility certainly is a scary thought.  It might be enough to make me think about going off in search of a gun myself.

But here’s the thing.  I believe that we have greater protection than guns.  I believe that there are hundreds of thousands of people walking around on our planet whose sole purpose for living is to carry a torch of light to help others to find their way through the dark.  They are faceless, they are nameless, they have never met, yet they are joined in consciousness as one in service to humanity.

Fear gone unchecked creates wars, and the war against fear itself begins with each individual.  It is not an easy battle, but for those who choose to engage in the fight, there are outstretched hands to help make it easier.  It is a noble undertaking to choose love above fear.  Reach out and someone will take your hand.

So, I ask my Self what we can do to help ourselves undo fear and replace it with visions of healing and rebirth.  Self replies:

You can remember that there is a Divine Plan at work and everything happens for a reason.

You can remember that in the war between good and evil, good is winning, even though it may not seem evident at this moment.

You can know that no matter what, you will make it safely through whatever the future may bring.

You can use your imagination to create a vision of a new and beautiful world without the need for guns.

You can have faith that no matter how bleak things may look, you may rest in the knowledge that you will make your way across the bridge from despair to the safety of the new world that awaits you on the other side.

And that is all for today, dear one.

Huh.  It appears that I have just outed my spiritual activist tendencies.

Yes.  So it would appear.  We’re happy about that, and may we say it is about time.  The world can use more of them. We are also happy that you are now speaking your Truth.

Me too.  Thank You!