The day didn’t get off to a very good start. I was jolted awake by the realization that a 10 am meeting might wipe out my self-imposed blog deadline. Enter self-doubt. Then there were about two hours worth of a couple of dozen false starts—write, delete, repeat. Enter frustration. No matter how hard I tried to force the issue, nothing worked except that I was getting nowhere at warp speed. Enter arrgh!
Creativity on demand doesn’t always work out well. Where is the go-with-the-flow?
The answer hit me when I took a wander-around break to clear the cobwebs out of my head. Experts may disagree, but in my mind, the term ego is interchangeable with personality. It just helps me to clarify things a little when I get confused about what’s what. Or maybe with who’s who.
What’s what is that my creativity was hijacked by my ego. The crafty little devil wanted to be in charge (so what else is new?) and was doing battle with my Higher Self for control. Once I manage to to return to my right mind, that doesn’t always bode well for the ego.
After my little sojourn to the kitchen and back, I got it. In my panic and haste to beat the clock, I didn’t take the time to sit down and have a little confab with my Self. Uh oh—flunked meditation again and that means trouble. That’s always a mistake.
But here’s the good news—every mistake comes with a lesson attached. Today’s lesson is, don’t do that again! It’s never a good idea to go running off into the day without stopping to check in with in my Self first because I’ll be led astray by the tricky ego every time. It’s always comforting to remember that every mistake moves me one step closer to a happy ending.
Perhaps the worst mistake of all would be to leap back into life full-steam ahead without using this precious at-home time to delve deep within and connect with the part of me that knows and remembers that I am a Soul, not an ego. Life just works better when viewed from a higher perspective.
There will come a day when this little pandemic vacation getaway will come to an end and then it’s hi ho, hi ho—it’s back to life we go, and I wonder—who will I be and what will I have learned when I come out the other side? What will any of us have learned?
For now, all I know for sure is that it’s hi-ho, hi ho it’s off to a meeting I go.
And tomorrow and the next day too. We’ll see how that goes . . .
Note: The photo above is courtesy of New Waves of Light, a website designed by anonymous individuals around the world who share the intention of bringing light and love to a world of darkness and chaos. (newwavesoflight.org or NWOL.us).